“Sex, a great and mysterious motive force in human life, has indisputably been a subject of absorbing interest to mankind through the ages.” – William J. Brennan
They’re the sex questions at the centre of women and men’s conversations everywhere, so I decided to give you the lowdown on what each question actually means and what’s the best answer for it.
Q. Should oral sex always be one-for-one?
Good sex shouldn’t be based on some sort of tally, but if you’re craving a bit of oral action, you have to be prepared to give and not just receive. I mean, if she’s willing, you have to return the favor. It’s selfish if you don’t. That being said, I must warn you about something: you should never give a sexual act just to receive one, but to pleasure your partner and experience pleasure with them. Of course you’d hope there is an equal split of pleasure being given by both people but it’s the intent during the act that you need to be aware of. The solution? How about one-for-one at same time?
Q. Why do some girls enjoy anal sex and some don’t?
Everyone is built differently. Those who have had a painful or uncomfortable experience the first time might not want to visit this again, or those with more traditional views on sex might believe that end is only for one thing. Some girls feel comfortable enough or understand their body well enough to be able to lock into that pleasure zone. And that’s because the guys they are with are able to make them relax and feel safe enough to try it. It is a daunting job, but one that’s perfectly achievable, as you probably already know if you have been reading my columns on this particular topic. Also, more and more guys are getting comfortable asking for this item off the menu because it’s so normal in porn land. However, don’t think that just by asking you’re entitled to force yourself upon your partner. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea so don’t make your significant other feel guilty if she decides to say no.
Q. How regularly should we get tested for STIs?
It’s wise to get tested before every new sexual partner, especially if you’ve had unprotected sex. A lot of men and women carry diseases without even knowing it! It’s always better to be safe than STI positive. However, due to the amazing act of casual sex, this is not always possible. How often you get tested will depend on your sexual behaviors. The more often you get checked the better, but it’s important to find somewhere to go where you won’t feel judged. You need to feel comfortable to get tested as much as you want and be able to discuss what’s on your mind.
Q. Do women still fake it?
Yes. With as many as 80 per cent of women experiencing orgasm via clitoral stimulation, all the energetic thrusting in the world might not get a woman there. Of course, that doesn’t mean it’s always your fault – sometimes a woman just can’t get there. Sex can still be great without an orgasm. The real problem with faking is that women are letting themselves down – if you think you are onto a good thing, you will stick with it. If a woman is well aware of what gets her over the edge and expresses this to her partner, there should be absolutely no problem in climaxing every single time.
Q. How often should a couple have sex?
Sex lives are going to vary from relationships to relationships. No couple is the same. Long-distance partners are going to go at it like rabbits in the small amount of time they have together while people living under the same roof might want to spread the love out a little. There is no set of rules when it comes to how many times you should be having sex. Ideally, as often as possible (if you want to do it twice a day, go for it!). Even though we live in a society where we are obsessed with comparing ourselves to others, when we talk about sex, there is no such thing as normal. If you are happy with the amount of sex you are having, why should it matter what everyone else is doing?
Q. Are women ok with us liking porn?
Depends on what you mean by ‘liking’. There’s owning a few DVDs that hide in the back of your cupboard, then there’s spending hours each day wanking to internet porn. As long as it doesn’t replace sex and it’s not becoming more important than your partner, you shouldn’t worry about it. Also, most girls find men’s ‘addiction’ to porn funny. No women really feels intimidated by something that will not happen in real life. Also, there are girls that are willing to join in on the fun. Now, that’s a healthy attitude!
Have a great week,
P.S. If you have questions that you don’t find the answers to in this article, please feel free to ask them in the comments section and I’ll make sure you get your needed replies! Check out my program on the subject, G-Spot orgasms made easy.