Tired of all those sex position guides that sound like they are meant for super models? Are you and your lover uniquely matched in a way that makes some of the standard sexual positions more difficult? Or do you just find yourself wondering “how do they do it?” when you see a basketball player dating an itsy-bitsy lady half his height?
There are several factors that affect how your body fits together with your lover’s in ways that may not be easy to figure out from the standard sizes and shapes we see in pornography and even in sex position books like the Kama Sutra. How often do you see your own body represented in erotic works?
Weight is often the most obvious, as it already affects so many other aspects of our lives and personality. Other factors though include things like height, flexibility, special abilities, physical disabilities, penis size, vaginal depth, likes and dislikes, needs and desires. In particular, BDSM activities of just about any kind can require special considerations for different body types and sizes. Don’t ever try to force your partner into a position in which she is not comfortable. Also try to vary up positions through sex to help keep the muscles from straining or cramping up. In missionary position, try to change the way her legs are positioned often and don’t put too much of your own weight on them for too long. Give her a chance to stretch out every now and again by changing up to a woman-on-top or from-behind position, or taking a step back and letting her lie flat while you employ some manual or oral techniques for a while.
If You’re Tall… and She Isn’t
This size combo lends itself well to standing sex positions and play that gets you out of bed. If you have the upper body strength, she can wrap her legs around your body and you can hold her up. Otherwise, try standing on the stairs or having her sit on something taller than a chair, like the kitchen counter, a set of dresser drawers, or the back of the couch. If she likes sex from behind, she can stand and bend over something, resting her hips on the arm of a chair or her hands on the seat. From this position, you should have a lot of downward leverage with which to thrust, giving you a chance to angle in different directions for a number of different kinds of stimulation, including the possibility of some serious g-spot contact. Enjoy!
If She’s the Tall One
Shorter guys will find standing sex easier in tight spaces where she would have a hard time getting up onto someone taller, making your body perfect for quickies in the restroom or up against the front door when you get home from work. Doggie style sex is also really great with short guys, because you can get down very low onto the bed and she can use her own leverage to thrust against you for a super sexy show you won’t soon forget.
If You’re a Bit on the Heavy Side
A bigger body can be great for some of the more taboo positions – 69, which can be very difficult with a skinny guy, becomes a great exercise in body on body contact. Try getting a bit oiled up with a massage first. She can lie down directly on top of you and slide back and forth while she holds you in her mouth and grinds up against your body. If you are also taller than her, you will have more space to see what you’re doing and use your hands.
If You’re More Bone than Meat
Many women, especially curvy ladies, find they get a bit self conscious with a very thin man, often feeling an overwhelming and irrational fear of crushing him. Thin guys tend to have larger members, mostly because they have fewer layers of fat padding the base, and tend to be in fitter cardiovascular health as well, allowing them to go longer and with greater stamina. If you’re this fit, start off with the missionary position and give it to her in as many different variations as possible. If you have a shorter penis, or she is ovulating, bring her legs up higher to get deeper. If you are large or her vaginal canal is shallow, keep her legs low to help prevent bumping her cervix too hard.
For skinny guys or larger girls, reverse cowgirl is a great position to switch things up a bit. She can hold on to your knees for leverage and support and grind her clit against your thighs and pubic bone without putting any pressure on your chest. Try switching up between this position and the missionary varieties for extra long-lasting lovemaking that cycles your energies back and forth between you for as long as you can stand it!
Hot kisses,
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. To make your orgasms more explosive, you’ve got to really commit on being creative. For innately raw, must-have-you-now sex positions, click this link.
