“My reaction to porno films is as follows: After the first ten minutes, I want to go home and screw. After the first twenty minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live.” – Erica Jong
Experts say that your seemingly harmless habit could wreak havoc on your sex life. Here, damage control. With so many countless free sites streaming smut to smartphone at 4G speed, it’s hard for a guy not to watch porn these days. But while some men are capable of using it in a non-destructive way (every once in a while or for a little inspiration during a solo session), watching too much can lead to problems in the bedroom.
As guys are exposed to virtual sex more and more, their desire for their partner may decrease. Read on to find out if porn is negatively affecting you and, if so, how to help yourself refocus on offline thrills.
1) Too much of a new thing.
You’d think that seeing so many chicks over-enthusiastically giving a man oral onscreen would translate into a walking erection when you’re present with the real thing. But weirdly, experts say it doesn’t work like that. That’s because guys are turned on not only by the sex itself but also by the fact that they’re constantly seeing new people doing new stuff. When a man sees a woman naked for the first time or views a new sex act, his brain releases more of the pleasure hormone dopamine that when he’s checking out someone or something he’s seen before. Unfortunately, the more porn you watch, the more likely it is to lead to something scientists call arousal addiction – when sexual excitement is only possible if you feel you are somehow topping what you’ve been exposed to in the past. You can become so hooked on the novelty factor that it’s harder for you to get and maintain an erection when you’re looking at something familiar… like your partner, for example.
2) A tricky topic.
If your equipment has been faltering lately and there is no other likely cause (illness or new meds, you are unusually stressed, your relationship is going through a rocky phase), porn could be the culprit. You may be suffering from arousal addiction, or an a physical level, frequent masturbation may have trained your penis to respond only to one type of manual stimulation. Guys often touch themselves using more friction and physical pressure than intercourse provides. If a man masturbates too often, normal sex can dampen his libido, make it harder for him to reach orgasm, even fail to satisfy him. Since you might not have realized that there’s a link between your eye-candy habit and your performance in the bedroom, this may come as an enlightenment. Indeed, porn may actually make you less horny. It’s really surprising how it can mess up with your mind.
3) Revving up your reality.
Once you know about the boner-killing potential of porn, work on a solution together with your partner. Make a plan to amp up your sex lives as a duo. Cut back on the porn a bit, and in the meantime, brainstorm new moves to keep things fresh in your bedroom. Anything that surprises you visually will help – such as lingerie that looks nothing like what your partner usually wears or a sex position that gives you a completely unexpected view. Role-playing is another great way to add sexy novelty as you shake off some of the potential negative effects of porn, which could happen immediately or take as long as two weeks if you need to readapt to the friction and sensations of real sex. Getting back to a place where you are both completely stimulated and satisfied will take some work, but it will definitely be worth it.
Have a sexy week,
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. PornHub, the most popular adult-video site has an estimated number of 15 million monthly visitors. A bit high, don’t you think?