Hey, there lover! Welcome to your intro guide to Anal Sex Toys for Beginners.
Anal sex is not as taboo as it once was, and many of couples are interested in trying it out for the first time. But to begin with it is often better to start slowly and playfully with fingers and toys, rather than going full on anal sex penetration.
- First your penis may be larger than your partner can handle if she is a beginner. I know you might think that’s a good thing, but in the case of anal play, size is something she may have to work up to as the anal sphincter is small and not used to stretching. With sex toys, you can choose a size suitable to what she can handle.
- Beginners trying anal sex for the first time may be too enthusiastic and thrust too hard, too deep or too fast to begin with. With sex toys, it is a lot easier to control the depth, force and speed of penetration.
- Sex toys also allow you to explore and experiment which is essential to learning this new skill.
Before You Get Started
Okay, guys, before you go all out with toys and anal play, be sure to get her warmed up first! I know, I say this over and over again, but foreplay (and lots of it) is the starting point for any great sex. So, here are a few tips to get you started:
- Make sure she is 100% on board before you begin. That means talk about trying anal sex with her first, allow her to express her fears and doubts, and go over the do’s and don’ts of anal sex together.
- Foreplay. Again, the F-word here, but it is very important especially when trying something new and as taboo as anal sex that she gets very turned on first. Start with kissing, licking, oral sex, fondling and fingering first, before you go near her butt.
- Lube. Lube is your best friend when you are having anal sex. The rectum does not self-lubricate like the vagina, so needs lots and lots of lubricant. We recommend a good thick water-based lubricant for anal sex, especially if you are using silicone sex toys. Butt! (pun intended) Don’t get numbing lubes with Benzocaine, because if you are doing it right she shouldn’t have any pain, and it is important for her to be able to feel it for both safety and pleasure reasons. Makes sense right?!
Toys for Anal Sex
Okay, lover, let’s get the good times rolling! There a lots of different sex toys used for anal sex. Some are better than others for beginners.
Anal Beads are the least intrusive type of anal toy. Basically, they are a bunch of beads (usually in varying sizes from smallest to biggest) along a length of string. They can be made out of metal, glass or softer materials like silicone or PVC Jelly. We recommend silicone toys for anal play as they are 100% body safe and are the only type of soft sex toy material that can be disinfected because they are non-porous. This makes them perfect for anal play, as you will want to disinfect your toys before and after play.
To use anal beads you begin by inserting the smallest bead inside a well-lubricated anus. Wait and see how she feels then continue slowly inserting the rest. Then just let them do their job stimulating her anus while you bring her to pleasure either via oral/clitoral sex or penetration. Just as she is experiencing orgasm, pull the string of beads slowly out which will give her a rush of exquisite pleasure. Make sure the anal beads you choose have a good retrieval ring!
Butt Plugs are usually triangle shaped and have a flanged wide base at the bottom to stop them from going in too far. Basically you never want to put something in the butt that doesn’t have a flanged base or retrieval ring as things have been known to get lost up there. Eeek! They come in various sizes and materials, however we recommend starting small and using a softer silicone material. You can also purchase anal starter kits which are great for beginners as they feature butt plugs in different sizes that she can work her way up to, in preparation for penile penetration.
Again, using lots of lube, insert the top side of the butt plug very slowly into the anus, inch by inch, giving her time to breathe and relax in between. Just press the tip against her anus until she opens up and allows you access, and her sphincter muscles will begin to pull the toy in. Once it is all the way inserted, she can leave it in for quite a while to get used to the feeling. Continue with foreplay, sex-play and bring her to orgasm, at which point she may push the butt plug out again due to the force of her orgasm. Whoa Mamma!
Anal Vibrators can be shaped like anal beads, butt plugs or anal dildos. Only difference is they vibrate, which can be very pleasurable for some people. Choose an anal vibrator that is soft and flexible, as well as small, thin and curved. If curved properly, you can actually access her G-spot via her anus with the right kind of toy. A G-spot vibrator works great for this and will double her pleasure (both anally and vaginally) if you gently press toward the frontal wall and rub her sweet spot there.
Try placing the vibrator just at the opening to her anus and rubbing it around with lots of thick lube. This will feel wonderful and is a great foreplay technique. Next, slowly insert the vibe bit by bit, until she doesn’t want any more. Then rub it and press against the inner wall of her anus to reach her G-spot below. Watch out, as she will probably have a mind-blowing orgasm like never before!
Remember, communication is the key to any good sexual experience. Make sure to check with her often for feedback, so you both get the most out of your first time trying anal toys together. The better it is her first time, the more she will be willing to explore more anal fun with you in the future.
Play safe and have fun!
P.S. For more relevant tips on how to enjoy anal, check out my program on the matter – Anal Ecstasy. Here you’ll find all you need to know about the subject.