Okay, you should all know by now that foreplay needs to be a part of sex… every. time.
You know that, right? Even with a quickie, there is always some kind of foreplay to get her in the mood, even if it’s brief. Well, when it comes to anal sex, foreplay is just as important, if not MORE important than with other forms of sex. If you’re lucky enough to be with a woman who is open to anal sex, you need to make sure that you don’t mess up and turn her off to it forever.
There are various factors that will go into your partner having a good anal sex experience, but one of the most important things you can do is warm her up for the big event. Here are 9 important anal foreplay tips to help you become a master:
1. You need to make sure she is completely up for it. Trying to sneakily do anal with your partner isn’t going to win you and points. The best way to find out if your partner will green-light some butt love is by flat out asking her. This is the only sure way to know whether she wants to try it or not. If you’re too scared to bring it up, you can also try out some anal foreplay (touching, tapping, light fingering, etc.) and see how she reacts. But keep in mind, even if she doesn’t seem to mind this, it doesn’t mean you have her permission to try anal sex, it just means that she might be open to it.
2. If you want your partner to enjoy anal, you need to start out slow. Start by stimulating some other part of her genitals first and then moving to her anus. For example, try going down on her and then beginning to touch, tap, rub and very lightly and shallowly fingering her anus, as you go down on her. For many people who are just getting into anal play, stimulating that area in combination with another is a great way to win them over.
3. Always go shallow. All of the nerve endings that feel really good when stimulated are at the opening of the anus, so it’s not necessary to stick your finger (or your penis, when it comes time) in really far. You definitely want to ease her into it, so stick with just the tip and she’ll be sure to enjoy it.
4. It should never hurt. Make sure you are using lube and help your partner to relax by taking things really slow. If something hurts at all, back off right away and assess the situation. She might be tensing up because she’s nervous. Her knowing that you aren’t going to continue to do anything that hurts can help put her at ease.
5. Go nice and slow. Contrary to what you may have seen in porn flicks, good anal and anal foreplay should take things slow, the WHOLE time.
6. If you stay shallow and only stimulate the opening of the anus, it’s a lot cleaner than you probably think. The rectum usually doesn’t have much fecal matter in it. If you or your partner are worried or self conscious about this factor, try taking a shower together first.
7. Another good hygiene rule is to make sure you never put a finger that was in her butt inside her vagina. You also shouldn’t use it to stimulate her clitoris or vulva. That’s how a woman can get an infection. To be on the safe side, you can put hand sanitizer and baby wipes on your bedside table.
8. Start exploring that area with your mouth. Next time you’re going down on her, let your mouth wander a little further down south and include her anus in your oral play. If you’re cool with it, that can be the perfect, soft, slow introduction to anal foreplay. You can poke, tap and even penetrate her anus with the tip of your tongue. Play around and see what feels good for her.
9. Accept her reaction, no matter what it is. Some women really like anal play. Some think it’s okay, enjoy it, but partake in it mainly for their partner. But then there are others that really don’t like it. If your partner falls into the last category, you need to accept that and move on. Anal won’t be in your future. If you have followed my advice above, then you’ve done everything you can to make it feel good and she’s just one of those ladies who doesn’t like it.