“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens”- Abraham Lincoln
This is an issue you must surely be familiar with. After all, we’ve all been there; we’ve all had that Stupid Fight. Besides the bickering that comes from various reasons, I have come to believe that there are some fights that are common among couples and that seem to appear with a certain frequency in everyone’s lives.
However, if you know exactly how to tackle each issue, these fights will just be great reasons for a good dose of make up sex, without cracking the communication or good understanding between the two of you. Read bellow to find out which fights are on my top 5 and what you can do to avoid them.
1) The drunk fight. It’s 2am and she’s in tears in the driveway after having an epic fight with you, after both of you had a little bit too much to drink. Sounds familiar? Liz Kelly, dating and relationship coach and author of “Smart Men Hunting”, says this happens because alcohol amplifies an otherwise low key argument. “Your view is blurred by the bottle, so you probably said something you now regret during the argument”, she says. (18) Exhaustion, on top of drinking, can make this fight scenario even more dangerous.
Avoid it by: Realize that when you’re drunk you don’t reason- logically and emotionally- that good. Agree to discuss the matters when both of you are sober and, most of all, never hold grudge about what has been said in an alcohol infused state. Whatever nonsensical musings she threw at you, forget about it. The popular idiom that states that drunken people tell the truth is not true!
2) The money fight. She blew 300$ on a new dress when you are both trying to save money for a trip to Thailand. She’s angry that you don’t understand that the dress was a self-rewarding gift because she passed the exam and got her driving license and doesn’t understand why you are making such a big deal out of it. Money can cause some major friction in your relationship if you’re not in sync. If one person is an impulse buyer while the other is a saver, you are bound to have purchasing disagreements.
Avoid it by: Setting a budget both of you agree on. No talking about money budgets and spending is bound to create pressure. Be clear on what you each have and want, and find a place in the middle that makes you both happy.
3) The “I didn’t orgasm” fight. It’s easy for your girlfriend to feel a tad ripped off if you’ve just completed a session between the sheets that left her more frustrated than fulfilled. Don’t panic though, it’s important to give yourself a break if you don’t manage to give her the pleasure she wants every time you have sex- provided she has a good overall orgasm average. If the train never stops in her station, however, you two need to have a firm chat with the… conductor. Your best bet is to ask questions to find out how to satisfy her in bed. Give her plenty of compliments and encouragements to downplay any frustrations or awkwardness.
Avoid it by: Have her gently and kindly guide you in the right direction. Let her know you really do what her to have a good time and that it would help you a lot if she pointed you to the right spot, at the right time.
4) The ex fight. At some point, you’re bound to get into an argument about the ex, especially if either of you ended a relationship just before you got together. This argument develops because neither of you feels safe nor secure in how you feel about each other. Or, you might get upset because you think you’re meant to be her knight in shining armor- so why is she talking to that old guy?
Avoid it by: Understanding that the past is the past, and letting it go. Excuse the ex from the conversation by changing the subject whenever it comes up. Focus instead on what is important between the two of you- you don’t need a third party. And at the end of the day, she’s with you and he’s not, so what’s to worry about?
5) The special occasion fight. This fight crops up when your vision of the evening is not met by your partner: it’s your birthday, for instance, and you want to drink beers with all your friends- and she demands a romantic evening just for the two of you. It’s important to talk beforehand about your expectations to avoid major disappointments. If you put too much pressure on the situation, you’ll most likely get upset over any little thing that it’s not like you’d want it to be.
Avoid it by: Talking about your plans, so you can prevent the onslaught of tears when she realizes you’re not that fond of all her extensive preparations. Give lots of hints and be very specific, because, at the end of the day, she wants you to feel good, not to ruin the evening for the both of you.
Have a seductively pleasurable week,
P.S. I know that there is a certain amount of pleasure in winning a fight, but don’t go there. It will just weaken your couple.