If you are like most couples, sometimes your sex life can get Boring with a capital B. What was once a thriving sex life can quickly go from thriving to dying on the vine. That is certainly not unusual as life circumstances can lead to lust becoming a fickle fiend instead of a steady friend. Over time couples often get so busy with the daily grind of work, kids and responsibilities sex often gets put on the back burner. Even when couples try to move sex to the front burner and increase the heat they are often so tired from day to day living, putting the needed energy into having a long or satisfying sexual encounter is not even close to the top of their priority list.
Red Light-Green Light
That is the bad news. The good news is putting the spark back in your boudoir does not have to be like trying to start a fire without a match. With a little effort and imagination even the simplest or smallest change can mix things up enough to turn a smolder into a blaze.
Be Large and In Charge
Guys, if you want to put some sizzle back into your sex life but are unsure where to start, don’t sweat it. Just decide to do something about it. Someone in the relationship has to be the one to make the first move toward sexual CPR. Let it be you.
Sex is not a Game…Except When it is
One very easy thing you can do to spice things up is to incorporate a sex game into your foreplay. One simple but fun game is Dirty Dice. You can get them online or at a sex toy store. They look like regular game dice except instead of dots that represent numbers on them, one has body parts and one has a sexual act. Shake the dice together and you can get something like “lick earlobe,” or “caress breast.” The person who rolled the dice has to do whatever the dice says to their partner. Shake the dice and see what shakes out in the bedroom. Make it fun and it will be sexy.
Bring the Kink
Kinky sex means a variety of things as people have different forms of sexual expression. Bringing a little kink into the mix can help revive a tired sex life but the kink does not have to be something drastic like waiting for your partner in a leather hood. Try something simple at first like blindfolding your partner. When you blindfold someone and take away their ability to see what you are doing, all of their other senses become heightened and it can be like opening a whole new sexual world. Pick up a sexy silk sleep mask and have her lay on the bed while she wears it. Then use your lips and fingers to kiss, lick and caress her slowly all over her body. She will be better able to concentrate on what she is feeling and how her body is responding.
Make it a Happy Meal
Food is not just for the dining room. Bring some chocolate sauce and whipped cream into the bedroom and make a sundae on your partner’s body. Don’t forget to put a cherry in her belly button! Don’t be afraid to mess up your sheets! Make your bed into a picnic area and take the time to taste each other. Put the cold whipped cream in the hottest area of her body and see if you can lick it all off before it melts! Food can be a sexy friend so think about making it your new BFF.
Save the Date
As much as we would like for sex to be spontaneous so we can be swept off our feet, the reality is that is not always possible. This is when sex tends to fall by the wayside. One of the best tips for couples looking to improve their sex life is to make time for their sex life. Schedule sex dates with each other. Doesn’t matter if it is a nooner at a Motel 6 on your lunch hour or a night in a 5 star hotel, it can all help reignite the fire. During these sex dates, have sex. Do not lie in bed and watch TV. Turn cell phones off or at least on vibrate only if you have a babysitter that may need to reach you in an emergency. Use this time to take a bath or shower together. Touch, kiss, talk dirty to each other. Have sex. While at first making a sex date may seem lame after the first time or two you will soon come to appreciate their purpose and look forward to them.
Sex doesn’t get better by magic. It takes effort on the part of both parties involved. Try these tips to get started on the path to sexual satisfaction.