All fingers are not created equal! If you’re down for offering her some explosive orgasms that make her scream “I’ve never met someone like you!”, check out my special training tips&tricks.
Over the years, I have realized something that’s true for each and every woman, no matter the shape and size: the main thing that truly helps us achieve the elusive orgasm is not a complicated technique — it’s simply being relaxed. You can probably also relate to this. When you experience anxiety in the bedroom, your performance is totally ruined, leaving you even more insecure and confused.
No matter how confident she seems, she needs to feel relaxed around you in order to experience all those amazing sensations you can create for her. Otherwise, all of your efforts will be useless. We all know by now that female orgasm is complicated and not easy to reach — the most recent studies regarding this issue have shown that only around 30% of women experience orgasms consistently during sex (85% for men, lucky you!) — but we also know that some serious advances have been made. We know so much more about all those small sensitive details that go into the art of pleasuring a woman. We know that almost every woman can climax and even have multiple orgasms if the circumstances are right for her… and those circumstances usually involve you. She needs a caring and understanding man who is willing to learn more about sexual pleasure every day (if you’re reading this, you are that man and you have my admiration!), and who uses his knowledge to help her relax and reach that absolute sensation we all crave.
Fingering is a great way to get intimate with your partner because it can also be approached as an intense foreplay, without the pressure which usually comes from penetration. It’s also extremely valuable to you because it helps you understand her intimate anatomy before going to the next level. Why is that important? Well, because — let’s get real here — some men don’t even know where their partner’s clitoris is located. If that is or was the case for you, I’m not blaming you and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. The epicenters of pleasure are really sneaky when it comes to women. For example, some women have a visible clitoris even without stimulation. Others have it covered by little folds of skin which resemble a tent. Some women have large outer labia, while others appear to have none. And if you think porn can give some insight, you might be wrong — porn stars go through cosmetic surgery to make their lady parts appear more attractive to men, so there’s not much diversity there.
But diversity is beautiful, don’t you think? And the beauty of it all is the discovery. It’s in your power to explore and discover all of her epicenters of pleasure, and what better tool to work with than your hands? If you’ve tried fingering before but it wasn’t her cup of tea, you haven’t tried my special techniques yet. Read on to make fingering more enjoyable than ever for you both!
Take a dive together
Now that we know relaxation is key to better sex (and lots of orgasms!), you wanna make sure she feels 100% sexy and relaxed around you. It’s going to be worth it, I assure you. Because a relaxed and confident woman is much more willing to give you everything you’ve ever imagined in bed!
So what could be sexier than taking a luxurious bath together? Make sure that bubble bath smells great and keep a massage oil on hand. While sitting behind her in the bathtub, lather up her body with your bare hands, using slow and sensual movements, and rather long ones: start from the shoulders, make a brief stop on her boobs and then let your hands slide all over her body until you reach her calves. Then go back and reach her intimate area with both hands while slowly biting her ear. Dominate her in a subtle way by slowly massaging that area with both hands — this sends a powerful erotic message: “You are mine and I accept and want all of you”. You will feel her opening up to you. If she opens her legs slightly, massage her clit while putting one finger inside of her slowly. Don’t forget that the level of lubrication is affected underwater, therefore be very gentle. Give her just a taste of what’s coming.
Make it even more slippery
Slip is important when it comes to female pleasure. You score big time if you’re also able to stimulate all of her senses, and the easiest way to do that is using an aromatic massage oil. Treat her after the bath: while her body is still slightly wet, rub some aromatic oil all over her, insisting on her lady parts (make sure the oil is gentle and safe to use in the intimate area). The pleasant smell and the erotic scenery will open her up to you in a relaxed atmosphere, where she’s feeling safe and desired. If necessary, add an oil based lube to the mix before you finger her vagina — the extra slip will make things a lot more comfortable and therefore pleasurable for her.
A little oral action
A lot of women are actually intimidated by oral sex and don’t find it pleasurable at all, but that’s only because they are unable to relax and open up to this incredibly sexy and intimate experience. After you’ve applied the relaxation methods above, she’ll be ready to enjoy it, so add a little oral action to the mix. While penetrating her with your index and middle finger, caress her clitoris with your lips for a few seconds, then use your tongue to lick it like you would an ice-cream, but do it very slowly while making eye contact. She will go mad with pleasure! Now that she’s getting wetter, you can move your fingers a little faster, while using the other hand to apply more pressure on her clitoris. Remember — clitoris is key to unlock her pleasure potential, so make sure to always involve it!
Hot kisses,
Gabrielle Moore
P.S. Sweetheart, now you know you can accomplish so much by using a few relaxation methods while pleasuring her with your hands. For even more advanced techniques on the fine art of fingering, I invite you to check out my intensive course on the matter — Flirting Fingers — and become a true expert!