Sudden, desperate quickies against the kitchen counter can be insanely hot, but the best sex is rich and soulful. That kind of transcendent sex where you feel completely connected to your partner — that’s what you want to be aiming for if you want to enjoy simultaneous orgasms tonight and every night. These positions harness the bonding powers of science, neurochemistry, and things that just feel amazing to bring you closer as couple. So much closer that a well-timed climax is always on the table for you.
Even though doggy style seems raw and animalistic, when you turn it on its side — spooning-style — it magically turns sweet and loving. Snuggle up with her (she’s the little spoon) and you can gently thrust inside her from behind, drawing it out for deliciously long, leisurely boning. The prolonged contact will leave you both so lust-laden that, after a while, every little stroke will feel amazing and completely in sync. Plus, with her legs squeezed together, it’ll really feel like you’re filling her up.
Instead of giving her an orgasm, then passing out for the night, make the rule that neither of you can come ’til morning. Throughout the night, whenever one of you happens to wake up, give the other one a sweet kiss or a sexy rub between their legs and you can occasionally thrust a few times in her/against her. Her desire, and your erection, will ebb and flow throughout the night, but you will spend the night in a dreamy state between sleep and desire. In the morning, you won’t be able to wait to make each other come.
Try some ancient tantric techniques for connecting deeply with your partner. Sit facing each other with her legs draped over yours. Stare into each other’s eyes and synchronise your breathing. It may be super weird at first — your legs and your soul feel way too open — but keep at it. Maintain eye contact and start touching each other gently on non-erotic zones, moving on to more dangerous areas. Have her sit on your lap, straddling you, for some long sweet kisses, then slide her onto your penis for some truly soulful sex which can only end with a simultaneous orgasm, of course.
You can connect on a deeper level during missionary with affectionate touches like holding hands, wrapping her legs around you, stroking her back, running your fingers through her hair or entwining your legs with hers. Share deep kisses, long hugs, and suck on her nipples — all release oxytocin, the bonding hormone.
In a horrible phenomenon called The Coolidge Effect, being sexually satisfied by a partner will slowly kill your desire for them. Yes, it is woefully unfair, but you can hack your stupid biological programming by not being sexuality satisfied. Which sounds horrible, but actually works. What I am basically advising you here is to start practicing edging — get completely turned on, but back off a little right before you feel like you might orgasm so you’re always on the edge. A great position for this is to start in a spooning position, then lift her top leg back over yours and turn her torso so she’s on her back, facing you, with you still inside her. Try this edging stuff for a month (if you can!) and you’ll find yourselves spending way more time in bed because you won’t be able to get enough of each other.
P.S. Simultaneous orgasm is probably the best thing there is when it comes to super-connected sex, so I applaud you for seeking out ways to achieve it. Click this link and check out my program on the subject – The Art of Coming Together.