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4 sex tips just for newlyweds

Premature Ejaculation

4 sex tips just for newlyweds

“Something is wrong here: sex has been with us since the human race began its existence, yet I would estimate that 90 percent of human beings still suffer enormous inhibitions in this area.” – Xaviera Hollander

Back in the days of virgin brides, newlywed sex was likely an earth-shattering event. But with 80 percent of women engaging in premarital sex, and 65 percent cohabiting before tying the knot, many young women today have tried every move in the book by the time they hit their wedding-night sheets. And having all of that experience under your belt – literally – can present a challenge when it comes to making things new and exciting once your commitment is officially sealed.

Couple often create an image in their minds of how much better sex will be once the rings are on, but a wedding ceremony doesn’t transform your intimate life; you have to take charge of breathing new energy into it. To find out how to do that, here’s some expert essential advice.

Newlywed tip 1

Take a hiatus

Building up anticipation can make newlywed sex more intense. When couples abstain from sex in the weeks before their nuptials, they may find that their wedding-night sex is the best sex of their lives simply because they’re jonesing for it. This is a technique you can use long after the honeymoon’s over. The psychology is simple human nature: you need it, you want it, and you can’t get it yet… and that makes you want it all the more.

What’s going on here is not only psychological but physical as well. Physiologically speaking, an absence of bedroom activity causes your hormones to rage, and this likely makes your partner look even sexier and more desirable to you. Hormones are powerful chemicals, as powerful for women as for men. First, let your woman in on the plan so she doesn’t feel rejected. Then feel free to tease her for hours, days, or even a week. Whether you’re writing her suggestive emails during the workday, giving her long, lingering kisses and nothing else, or sleeping next to her naked while initiating other things but not intercourse, you’re creating that necessary tension. By the time you give up, you’ll both be incredibly worked up, which will lead to stronger orgasms.

Newlywed tip 2

Get into lust-after-her mode

Novelty is one of the greatest aphrodisiacs. The trick is to use the excitement of being a newlywed to train your mind to focus on looking at your wife in new and exciting ways. First let the more mundane, comfortable aspects of the relationship fall by the wayside. Don’t think of her as the girl who takes care of you when you’re sick, cuddles with you when you’re sad, and helps you with everyday chores. Let that fall away, and focus strictly on her sexual aspects. What is it about her that really turns you on? Maybe it’s watching how sensual she gets after a long massage or the way she looks right after she steps out of the shower. And the next time you lay eyes on her, really zone in on a specific body part of hers that you find erotic. Maybe it will be her tight tush that always drove you mad or her toned belly that you longed to rest your head on. If you stay in that mind-set, where you’re continually making an effort to see each other through early-stages eyes, it will stick with you throughout your marriage.

Newlywed tip 3

Be carnally creative before you reach the finish line

One of the reasons couples continue to do the same routine that they’ve used since they were dating is they know exactly when to hit the hot button that’s going to make their partner orgasm. And while you don’t want to shelve a sure-fire sex move, the first year or so of your marriage is the time to be on the lookout for new ways to please each other, starting with foreplay.

Try blindfolding your wife, then use some new moves on her. With her vision gone, she’ll be able to focus on the sensations. Rub an ice cube on her nipples, take a sip of a hot drink before you go down on her, or lick her in a new place around her clitoris but not directly on it. Watch her body for signs of arousal, which, besides the obvious, include faster breathing, an increased heart rate, and moaning or shaking when you hit a new spot. Then let her do the same to you. A couple will still be having good sex 10 years into the relationship (and beyond) if they have a flexible sexual repertoire.

Newlywed tip 4

Re-create an erotic experience

When a couple is just starting to date, they go through a period where they can’t keep their hands off each other. They have intense chemistry, and that’s not just a figure of speech. Studies have shown that when someone is infatuated with a new sex partner, their body reacts chemically and they find it hard to focus on anything other than having sex with the object of their infatuation.

To re-create those carnally charged days, think back to the things you used to do, and do them now. In the beginning, sex was an adventure and you’d often take risks. It’s likely you’d have sex in places other than the bedroom, so bring back those days by having sex in a restroom or in a car or outside in a pool.

Or replay a specifically hot scenario you experienced together early in your relationship. Maybe it’s the time she helped you move into your new apartment and instead of unpacking, you turned on the radio, drank wine straight out of the bottle, and got it on right then and there on the mattress on the floor. Surprise your partner with the same sheets (or lack thereof), wine, or even the clothes you remember wearing. Conjuring up the same tactile experience will help you to replay the hotness of the moment and just go with it.

Have a hot week,

Gabrielle Moore

P.S. These tips work just as well for couples that have been in a very long relationship and need to spice things up. In the end, it’s all about bringing some joy to the old routine.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. terrence

    January 31, 2014 at 8:11 pm

    Thanks for reminding me of these things . I’ve done those things with every woman i ever been with . But i try to keep new things in my back pocket to keep her guessing . I’m 48 going on 49 this year . Every new relationship , which i can count on one hand , i get into long years with them , i’m always told , that they which they had me years before because , i KNOW WHAT I’M DOING . Not to brag , but i’ve been married for over twelve years , and have two exgirl friends , and have not touch them sexually for over 20 years and they still try to throw hints to me for sex . Even they had men in their lives , but when they hear from me , out of the blue , they remember how i was able to make them sexually orgasmic , with multiple orgasms . Your story for newlyweds made me think of those things i did and i am always trying to always be a BETTER LOVER . There is always room for improvement , which i am i want to better myself .

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