If you know the statistics about male vs female orgasms, you know that men and women don’t always seem to be well matched when it comes to pleasure. For example, the average man only lasts about 2 minutes once he has penetrated his partner, vs the average woman who can take between 15 to 20 minutes to reach an orgasm. It doesn’t take a genius to see that this doesn’t work out very well for a couple having vaginal sex.
So, what is a guy to do? Although a man can train himself to last longer using special techniques, it will take some time and practice to be able to get to the point where he can last long enough to allow his partner to get off before he does (this is possible, however, later I’ll tell you how!). Another great idea is to simply change the way that you have sex. Most men focus on only vaginal sex when it has also been proven that most women don’t orgasm from vaginal sex alone.
In order to work on lasting long enough for your partner to cum, try some of the following techniques:
1. Don’t rush through anything – A lot of women are used to men who rush through all the foreplay in order to get right to sex, but guess what? Foreplay is PART of sex, in fact it’s a big part of it and it’s extremely important to women. Just think, women take longer to get turned on than men do. If you’re only spending a few minutes on foreplay, jumping into having sex and then it’s over in just a few minutes, do you think she’s getting off? Definitely not. Not every guy can last for as long as woman needs to get off, but you know what? It doesn’t matter. What if you considered getting her so close to orgasm through foreplay and then starting to have sex when she is extremely close to cumming? She will enjoy the extra sensation of penetration and surely cum really quickly. That will take the pressure off of you to last for a long time once you’re inside.
So if you’re thinking of how to get her there before you’re ready to penetrate, think about how she normally cums. You should ease into foreplay by starting with kissing and touching. Take your time with each step, because this will prolong the process for both of you and ensure that she gets really turned on before you move on to the next thing. After a while of kissing and touching her in various parts of her body, try moving on to either fingering her or oral sex, whichever she normally prefers. Your goal is to bring her as close to orgasm as possible and then start having sex. Once you start having sex, be sure that you’re in a position where you can easily continue to stimulate her clitoris until she cums.
Of course there is a chance that she won’t be able to cum within the time you have sex, even after focusing a lot of time on foreplay. If that happens, don’t worry, but definitely make sure you finish her off. Even if the only thing you want to do is roll over and sleep, make sure you go down on her or manually stimulate her until she cums. Then you can sleep all you want!
2. Relax – I know that probably sounds like ridiculous advice, but most guys who think they don’t last long enough feel very nervous and anxious about sex in general. They feel so stressed and focused on how long they are going to last that they barely even enjoy sex at all. Does that sound familiar? Let me tell you, that stress, nervousness and anxiety only makes the situation worse. If you’re so focused on the idea that you won’t last as long as you want, guess what? You’re not going to last. Your stress and emotions will ensure that whatever you’re worrying about will come true. So, instead of focusing on all your concerns, focus on relaxing. When you feel yourself getting nervous and worried, force yourself to calm down and start deep breathing.
3. Fake it Until You Make it – You have to boost your confidence if you want to last longer. I know that might seem impossible because the very reason you’re not confident in bed is because you don’t last as long as you want. My advice? Fake it until you make it. Tell yourself that you are confident. Your mind is powerful. If you control your thoughts, pushing away the negative ones and replacing them with positive ones, you will actually start believing it before too long.