It may seem cliche, but there is no hiding from the fact that the key to turning a woman on is through romance. The female brain is designed to seek security and reliability, where the male brain pursues sex much more ruthlessly. Turning on her body, whether it seems easy and straightforward or a maze of complexity, is still only the second step to the sex you seek. Before you even get close, you need to seduce her mind! These six simple steps will have her putty in your hands and eager to explore.
1. Eye Contact
Did you and your wife ever have that moment, early on in your relationship, gazing across the room at each other with the sparks flying? Do you remember how that moment felt, year heart thudding in your chest and your breath fast in your throat? There was a time when I would have given anything to feel that excitement again, and I’m grateful for it every time my husband gives me a playful wink or a suggestive eyebrow-raise from across the room.
Sure, a smooch on the way out the door and a few hot wet ones before sex are great, but don’t you ever just miss making out for the fun of it? Kissing is one of the best forms of foreplay available! Lots of women appreciate some lip action without the immediate expectation of sex. Why not warm her up a bit in the morning when she wakes up and leave her to simmer all day? When it does come to sex, mix it up a bit! Light kisses on her eyelids, nose, neck and other erogenous zones will have her warmed up and begging for more in no time flat.
3. Taking Control
Who initiates sex in your relationship? If it’s you, what’s your approach? Many people shy away from taking the reigns in sex – if you aren’t very confident or knowledgeable about pleasing your partner, it can be hard to make the first move with grace and strength, but this is what so many women crave!
Let her take control if she expresses an interest and don’t get offended if she gives you suggestions. When you want to start the scene, be open and honest. Tell her your desires and be ready to guide her in giving you what you want. A strong majority of women are interested in having their hair pulled, their bottom spanked or their wrists cuffed during sex, so no matter what your fantasy, open your mind and let her know – chances are she’s into some roleplay too!
Stop beating around the bush. We all have dreams, fantasies and desires and who better to help us experience these things than the love of your life? Sitting down to talk about your sexy secrets over an intimate dinner can open up the path to role playing your wife’s rescue fantasy, purchasing a sex toy together or donning a costume or uniform… but only if you’re willing to risk embarrassment and speak up!
Once you’re comfortable discussing your sexual fantasies in the low-pressure zone, it’s time to take it up a notch. When things are getting hot and heavy, the easiest way to get the dirty talk going is to talk about what you want your wife to do to you… or what you can’t wait to do to her. When you’re in the moment, you can draw things out by describing how the experience feels. This will not only allow you to spend more time together, but will heighten your excitement and hers.
The four main categories of non-verbal clues should come as no surprise: hugging, kissing, touching and looking. The best foreplay involves all four techniques, to stimulate the mind and body in as many ways possible.
Trying new things can be scary and she will need your comfort and support when working to define her needs and wants. When you’re in the moment, encourage her when she does something you really like – be clear and concise! If she’s doing something that isn’t particularly pleasing, gently guide her hands or mouth somewhere else, and save the critique for later.
Aside from praising her skill or technique, practicing the art of compliments in other areas will not only be greatly appreciated, but will allow your partner to feel more comfortable relaxing and opening up to you about her deepest desires. Be honest and tell her what you really love about her.
Foreplay is an art form and there is always more to learn. Once you’ve mastered these steps to smart seduction, why not go even further and learn the 8 essential kissing techniques every husband should have in his repertoire? Click this link and try something new tonight!