“I regret to say that we of the F.B.I. are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce.” — J. Edgar Hoover
Going down isn’t exactly an issue for Homeland Security, but it can be stressful for both partners if it’s not something you’ve tried for a while. According to the Kinsey Institute, this is a lot of you – barely more than half of all women aged 30-49 received oral sex from a male partner in the past year, and the numbers for women going down on their men aren’t much better…
So why all the fuss? Oral sex isn’t anything to shy away from! Talk to your wife – does giving or receiving oral sex make her feel anxious, scared or uncomfortable? What about you? Do you suffer from any feelings of inadequacy where your own oral foreplay skills are concerned? Well fret not. The basics of oral sex prep and technique are simple to master!
Getting Ready to Go Down
Bodies are sweaty, stinky beasts and though it is our animal instincts we want to get in touch with, we want to get sweaty together between the sheets, not deal with office BO, so get clean first! Take a long, thorough shower before initiating sex and while you’re all wet, take a look at the hair down there. Few people enjoy a face full of fur, so if you want to encourage your wife to keep clean and trim bush, you need to do the same. A body wax isn’t necessary – a trim or some Nair should do the trick and leave her pleasantly surprised!
This isn’t high-stakes finance, so don’t get stressed out, but it’s important to talk about oral sex a bit beforehand, so there is an understanding about protocol when you in particular are closing in on the big O. Whether you want to pause and move on to another position, or push through to climax, it’s important to have an understanding and an early warning system in place! No one likes to be caught off guard and if you want to keep getting blow jobs, you’ll let your wife have a say in how to finish things off.
Variation is the key for oral foreplay – start a good oral session off right with gentle, smooth strokes around the least sensitive parts of her genitalia, working your way towards the inner lips and clitoris. Be delicate! These bits are soft and sensitive.
A figure 8 motion is great to get her turned on, edging around her little bud as it swells. Alternate between the smooth underside and the rough surface of your tongue’s tip to bring her to the edge of pleasure.
Don’t stick to any one repetitive motion for too long, until she is panting hard and ready to go over the edge. When you’re at this point, find the motion that makes her moan the loudest and take it home!
You may not be able to think of a lot of different positions for oral sex off the top of your head, but put those tired old favorites out of your mind, if just for a minute. There’s nothing wrong with the standard fare, but why not spice things up once in a while?
Do you and your partner have any classic positions that work every time? How often do you try something new when you lock lips, so to speak? Well now is the time! Don’t worry, you don’t have to worry about trying anything crazy that will end in an embarrassing injury!
One of my favorites is to get my husband to lie over top of me, perpendicular to my body. From this position, he has free range to caress my breasts and can explore an entirely new angle for clitoral stimulation! This position also makes it much easier for him to use his other hand to penetrate when I’m wet and turned on.
Another that could encourage your partner to explore a whole new realm of both physical and emotional sensations related to power and control is a standing position. With your head hanging over the edge of the bed, your lover can straddle your face and has room to lean forward on the bed for support when her knees start to get weak!
Can’t get enough of these great ideas? Click the link below for 10 more incredible oral sex positions you have to try!