“I could massage your groin in a non-sexual way” – Shoshanna Shapiro (Girls)
Because I know you don’t have time to read the Kama Sutra before tonight, I’m lending you a helping hand while making sure you keep your woman more satisfied than ever. I know the scenario all too well: You promised her a sensual massage, she got excited and even bought the necessary oils and candles and all, and now you’re scared of disappointing her by not having a proper massaging technique.
Here’s what you have to do tonight to truly arouse and surprise her. It’s not rocket science, since I was able to describe it in such few words.
Start with a bang
A great erotic massage is all about the first 15-30 seconds. Lead with a “wow” and hold on for the ride. Embrace finger to finger, toe to toe and everywhere in between. Caress her main pleasure triggers first, so that you get her worked up right from the start. The back of her neck, her inner thighs and her breasts (especially the lateral parts) are all “ecstasy buttons” that, once stroked, release a flood of feel-good emotions throughout her entire body.
Amp up the anticipation
Use seduction. Start at the beginning of the day by texting and emailing your partner about what you’re going to do to her. Fill the whole day with innuendo and outrageous flirtation. When you see each other, brush against her and prolong the anticipation for as long as possible. The longer the “playing” time, the more aroused she will get so, when you finally get to the point of undressing her and starting the massage, she’ll be moaning wherever you choose to put your fingers.
Be in the moment
Focus on her skin and the sensation your touches bring her. Have her say what feels good. If you need oil or a sex toy to assist you in your “job”, don’t hesitate! By being creative and demanding more and more clues from her, you are letting her know you really enjoy the massage as well, which is a major turn on for a woman.
Breathe her in
While you massage her, choose long, slow, deep breaths to open your heart and surrender to her, or short, sharp and focused breaths to build up and expand her pleasure. How you choose to breathe in her ear determines the way she breathes and feels as well. More breathing, more feeling!
We can get stuck in the routine of what we think an erotic massage should be – kissing, a little stroke there, a drop of oil here, moving on to sex, and then sleep. To give good erotic massage, you need to know what you really want, not what you’ve been taught is normal, and explore something new.
Slip and slide
Lube helps create a different sensation during erotic massaging, which usually leads to more pleasure. Exploring with games, videos, lingerie, creams, bondage or toys can also take your erotic massage routine to new heights. You won’t know until you try it.
Become a foodie
Eat aphrodisiac foods for a stronger appetite towards all things sensual. I like “Nooky Noodles”, a stir-fry with wine, ginger and chili. When your blood is already worked up and hot from certain types of food that arise your sexual needs, the erotic massage will become the icing on the cake, the simplest of ways when it comes to unleashing her inner pleasure (and yours!).
The key to amazing erotic massage is strength. You don’t want to abandon your routine mid-way because you suddenly grew tired. Strengthening the muscles of your core, pelvic floor, hips, thighs and also arms, improves not only blood flow and sensation in all the right areas, but also stamina for resisting during all the massaging and the high-pleasure sex positions you are bound to try afterwards.
Have a gorgeous week,
P.S. Spice up your erotic massage routine with a yoga posture that invites sensuality and healthy sexual communication: trikonasana, the positioning of her legs in a triangle pose. Work from the legs and unravel to the hips, the torso and her heart, it will feel amazing.